Comedian Declares That Sex Rules

Last Wednesday, comedian Maria Falzone informed Shepherd students about sex during her comedy show.

On Sept. 17 at 6:30 and again at 9 p.m., students from all demographics gathered to learn and laugh at Falzone’s Consensual Sex Rules show in the Frank Center Theatre. The program was sponsored by Counseling services, Program Board, Student Activities and Leadership, Greek Affairs, Residence Life, and Shepherd Athletics.

Most of the student attendees were there representing their respective organization, team, or club.

Earlier that day, several students were handing out condoms in the library to promote the event. The later showing supported an almost full house.

Before the show began, the room was full of students engaging in conversation and laughter. But when Falzone took the stage there was silence.

According to imdb, Falzone has several television credits and has appeared on ABC, A&E, and TBS. She is a celebrated comedian and has been performing the Sex Rules for over 14 years.

Falzone came waving onto the stage with her bright pink mohawk, flip flops, and Boston accent ready to entertain and teach. Her demeanor was casual, fun, and quite frank. She introduced herself by saying, “I’m not a sex therapist, I’m a sexpert.”

Despite her fun-loving attitude, Falzone had a mission to achieve: she wanted the students to leave competent and informed about everything from human anatomy to anal sex. She “got real” with the audience, letting them know that her talk included some more serious topics and that she was “cutting the bullshit.”

Falzone went on to cover topics related to children’s sexual knowledge: sex talks, sex education, and sexual predators. People can protect their children, she said, by giving them knowledge about their bodies and what they do with their bodies.

Falzone said she had grown up with very traditional Sicilian parents; they instilled a fear of sex and the consequences of sex in her from a young age. Falzone was very open with audience and shared her first sexual experience, which did not occur until she was 21 years old, she said.

Falzone also discussed the issues of sexual orientation and the problems that those who are not heterosexual face. The rules of sex, she said, are the same whether you are gay, straight, bisexual, transgender, etc.

Falzone discussed safe practices for anal, vaginal, and oral sex. She recommended different products such as condoms and toys for the students in the audience to get the most out of their sexual experiences. She even brought a student volunteer on stage to demonstrate how far a regular condom can stretch by placing it on his hand.

The first rule of sex, Falzone said is, “Sex starts with you.” She advocated that everyone stand up for what they want out of their sex lives. If they wanted a monogamous relationship, to wait until marriage, to have casual sex with several partners, it was all up to them. Each person has to find out what it is that they want and need.

Falzone ended the show by having the audience stand and have “group sex” by shouting out together. The whole evening, the audience laughed, gasped, and participated along with Falzone.

Students who did not attend Falzone’s Sex Rules talk last week can reach out to on twitter @mariafalzone or through her website sexrules.org.

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